A woman is standing under the shower, she has a relaxed look on her face.

Do you hear yourself defending your behaviors or shortcomings in all sorts of ways? Because I do. I used to do it all the time. I have ADHD, which is THE BEST excuse there is. And don’t get me wrong, I have ADHD , but most of the problems it causes have a solution. You just have to figure out what works for you. And that may take some time.

Acknowledge the culprit

The first and most important thing you have to do is recognize that the behavior is a problem. Sometimes things aren’t a problem, but if that’s true, you shouldn’t have to defend yourself. It’s just not important for you to fix the behavior or maybe you see more harm for yourself than good. Being imperfect is perfectly fine, but if your problems are getting in the way of life or your relationships, it might be time to look closely at what’s happening.

Whether it’s forgetting the time under the shower, struggling with punctuality, or facing difficulty with household chores, accepting that this is something we are struggling with is the starting point for positive change.

Take Responsibility

Once we acknowledge the struggle, it’s crucial to take full responsibility for it. Blaming external factors, trauma, mental illnesses, or other people only perpetuates the cycle of repeating the same behavior. By accepting that this is our problem to solve, we **empower** ourselves to find effective fixes. Remember, we are the only ones who can truly address and resolve our own challenges.

And please pay attention to the word empower. It gives you power over your own problems, and that might be something you’ve never seen as an option. I know I never did. And it feels great to realize I really have the power to change.

Next is…

Finding effective fixes

Finding fixes that work for us requires some action and experimentation. Forgetting the time under the shower? Set a timer to keep yourself aware. Struggling with punctuality? Set multiple alarms or use calendar reminders to help you stay on schedule. Having trouble getting the dishes done? Try to break the chore into smaller parts or consider alternative solutions like using disposable utensils or just getting rid of most of your dishes. The key is to find strategies that work for you.

Be Your Own Grown-Up

Taking responsibility for our mistakes means adopting a mature mindset. It’s important to recognize that we are capable of self-improvement and problem-solving. Seek advice from others who have overcome similar challenges and be open to their suggestions. Embrace a growth mindset and view each mistake as an opportunity to learn. Trust me, it will make your life much more enjoyable.


Making the same mistake over and over again can get in the way of things, but by taking responsibility and actively seeking effective fixes that work for you, we can break the cycle and pave the way for lasting personal growth. Embrace the power to change, be open to advice, and remember that you are your own grown-up.

Remember, making mistakes is not equal to failing in life. You are perfectly capable of growth and progress. Embrace it, learn from your mistakes, and become a better version of yourself. You can do it, I know you can.